Mama, I'm In Deep

 

 

 

                              again, been trailing

behind my lace                

                                          again, been

 

telling all my suns they need to hold

a holy but even summer’s a slicker,

mama, a wash,

                           & another thing is

 

thunder, I may wish

                      for the sword but I’m soft

in the skirt when I see

 

 

                                        the girls soft

in theirs, I know, the unknown

                                                       parts

 

 

from them, & then it’s a fury in the

May my mind lost

 

                             as if the garden God

pruned His men out of

                                          fed the fire out

from under feeling

 

 

                          what I feel what I tell

myself to remember

 

                        sulfur, smoked between

 

 

her lips I heard

                                      the coming of

the Lord but couldn’t loose

                                     myself, mama,

couldn’t burn my bad

 

 

                                    old beauty down

to the cherry topping a tube of paper

rolled around then licked, livid,

                                                        was her

tongue dried

                       honey, burnt marvel,

the slats of a barn raised up

                                                hallelujah

the hands

 

                   said they feared a Lord with

ugly lips, I know

 

 

                          it’s not right but I

don’t

 

            know what my left is doing,

mama, under

                        the hunger I found my

self in half

                   a mine & half

                                                  a her

 

 

bodied, cold as cut grocery

                                    roses, a bloomed

sickness all pink smelling, mama, & I

don’t know if it’s my

 

 

                                   self or your God

I should blame.


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